In this haze of everything that has been my second to last semester of college, one of the only things I can remember clearly (besides my thesis) are those fading feelings for you.
I don’t know when it started; heck, I don’t even think I wanted it to happen.
Or did I?
See, the thing is, it seems like I’ve had a crush on you for forever. I know you almost as much as I know myself, know your quirks and whenever you’re hiding your feelings deep inside. But the thing is, maybe knowing you too much was what put these feelings back in the trunk of ‘oh my goodness, get those feelings out of here’ feelings. Maybe realizing that we would never be a perfect match was what made my crush melt away.
Or maybe it was him.
Maybe it was when he suddenly appeared into my life, taking every feeling I’ve ever had and multiplying it by five. Maybe it was when he gave me hope, gave me a reason to wonder why, and ask ‘what if’.
In all honesty, you, I really did love you.
I just loved someone else more.